Book Review: Affluenza, By Oliver James

WARNING: This post is very long. Like, reeeeally long.

( James, Oliver. Affluenza. Vermilion, 2008. Print.)

In Affluenza, James argues that “just as Aids is stalking the globe, so is the Affluenza Virus”. The 'Affluenza Virus' is emotional distress caused by placing high value on money, fame, possessions, status and appearance. James calls these aspirations to money, fame, etc. 'virus goals'. James puts forth that anxiety, depression, and emotional distress in general, are on the rise because we aspire to 'virus goals' with 'virus motives'. 'Virus motives' include working for reward and praise and working for the approval of others. James attributes the 'Affluenza Virus' to the 'selfish capitalism' that is rampant in most English-speaking nations. 'Selfish Capitalism' is defined by James as four principles: success of business is measured by share price, businesses are driven to privatize public utilities, businesses believe that there should be little regulation for business and the rich should be able to get richer, and finally, the idea that you can meet all your human needs with the right purchases.

I particularly loved this book not only because James helped me to see where many of my own anxieties could be rooted, but also because he proposed a list of 'vaccines' for the virus. Although some of the vaccines don't apply to me at this time in my life ('Meet Your Children'd Needs, Not Those of Little Adults', 'Educate Your Children, Don't Brainwash Them', and 'Enjoy Motherhood, Not Desperate Housewifery/Househusbandry'— these will be helpful in the future!), much of the advice was very useful.

The first 'vaccine' is 'Have Postivie Volition (Not “Think Positive”)'. James outlines that the very 'American' idea of 'thinking positive' causes the subject to push negative thoughts away and pretend things are going well; creating a positive illusion about a not-so-positive situation. Instead, the author offers a list of advice. Here are some points I found most helpful:

1. “Your best is good enough”: as long as you did your best, you're not to blame
2. “It's not your fault that you are who you are”: have realistic expectations of yourself; you can't change many of your characteristics that are determined by your family and society. In my own mind, it helps me to remember that God loves me and He made me to be the way I am; God gave me different abilities and limitations and I will honour them.
3. “At the same time, you must accept that the particular situation you are in is chosen by you and that you are a free agent, with volition”: (volition means using your own will) So, even though you are constrained by certain characteristics, you can still decide a great number of things about your life. In my mind, I remember that God gave me free will!
4. “Form as truthful and accurate an assessment as possible of yourself and your society, rather than living in the rose-tinted bubble of positive illusions”: you can't improve your situation if you have an inaccurate view of your life.
5. “Don't be scared about examining your failures as much as your successes when searching for clues about what to do”: pretty much, you can learn from your mistakes and your triumphs
6. “Don't take responsibility for what is not your fault or for others' achievements”
7. “Be as self-concordant as possible”: “align your values with the life you live”. So, for example, I want to follow Jesus, who calls us to love others and lay down our lives for our neighbors… so it would be self-contradictory for me to pursue a career that is all about money, fame and putting myself above the needs of others.

The second vaccine is 'Replace Virus Motives (with Intrinsic Ones)'. In this chapter, James advises his reader to stop working only for rewards, praise and the approval of others. Instead, he suggests that we become motivated by the pleasure we get from doing an activity. He also describes intrinsic motivation as “the getting there rather than the arriving, the process by which a result is achieved rather than it's completion.” Some examples of intrinsic motivation include supporting others, beauty, self-expression, having fun. James also says that in some cases, pursuing a virus goal such as money may not cause emotional distress if the motivation for the goal is intrinsic. Some of James' advice includes:

1. “Audit your Motives and Goals”: are you doing things to please others, or yourself? James offers an example: “You may say 'I get dolled up to go on dates so that the other person will like me, to please them, but ultimately, it's so I can get close to them physically and mentally, so it's really to please myself.' In which case your motive is intrinsic. The problem is if your dolling up is in order to feel better than others, or to show off, or to manipulate and use.” This is one of the most helpful vaccines I found in this book. Now, I think more about my motives for my activities and I have realized how much of my stress is related to working hard in order to impress others or receive approval!
2. “Identify Work Activities Which Have Intrinsic Motivations”: self explanatory. For me, for some reason, I really enjoy volunteering at the local Oxfam charity shop. Maybe it's because I am supporting an organization that does good things, or maybe it's because I love looking at awesome clothes and styling sweet outfits, or maybe it's organizing all the clothes that gives me a weird high, but I just really enjoy that work!
3. “Identify Play Activities Which Have Intrinsic Motivations”: do hobbies that you find “absorbing, exciting and stimulating”— not activities that are people-pleasing or to be a part of a group. For me, this blog is definitely a hobby with intrinsic motivations. Although sometimes I do try and cater to my small, but loyal, readership, I write because I love to write and I want to share my life with my friends and family at home!

Next, James asks us to “Be Beautiful (Not Attractive)”. The opening statement of this chapter provides a very concise definition of this principle: “Valuing beauty is a defining feature of the intrinsically motivated; using physical attractiveness to gain praise or manipulate others is what the Virus-infected do.” The author says that it's okay to want to dress and look a certain way as long as that way is defined by our own perception of beauty and not the ideal impressed upon us by the media. I'll leave it to you to read the book yourself to look at the interesting case studies of Muscovite and Danish women and their motivations for their beauty regimes. James' vaccines on this subject include:

1. “Rediscover the meaning of beauty by observing small (three-to-eight-year-old) children”: James suggests that children hold the key to being beautiful because instead of dressing to impress others, they carefully choose their outfits for their own indulgence. For example, one of the girls at church last week was wearing a Snow White costume with bright pink socks and silver shoes. She looked silly to me, but I bet she felt like a princess! Remember: businesses push their image of attractiveness in the media in order to sell their product!
2. “When trying on clothing in a shop and looking in the mirror, forget altogether about what others might think”: (okay, yeah… easier said than done)
3. “When considering cosmetic appearance-enhancing purchases, ask yourself 'Will this make me more beautiful?'”: For me, spending $ on skin-cleanser that actually works will definitely make me more beautiful… because to me, clear skin is beautiful.
4. “If you are middle-aged, ruthlessly interrogate any desire you have to look younger”: If you are 30, look like a beautiful 30-year-old… If you are 40, look like a beautiful 40-year-old, etc…
5. “Stop reading womens' magazines!”
6. This one is directed towards men and is titled “Learn from Danish Men”, but it really just advises the reader to appreciate beauty in others, not sexual desirability or ability to keep up with trends. It also talks about looking beyond appearance to see your potential partners' (cheese alert) inner beauty.
7. This point is also directed at men, but is relevant for anyone: “Be Emotionally Intelligent”: basically, James calls his readers to know how they are feeling and to be able to talk about it with someone.

“Consume What You Need (Not What Advertisers Want You to Want)” is the title of the next chapter. From my own education in graphic design I have learned a fair bit about branding. I've learned that advertising agencies no longer present only the attributes of a product or service to their consumer, appealing to our practical senses. Ad agencies use branding to appeal to the consumers' emotions, to the way the consumer could use the product or service to present their lifestyle or image. In other words, we are becoming increasingly concerned with what our possessions say about us, not how useful they are. In effect, we are spending beyond our means to possess the car, house, wardrobe, television, camera, mobile phone, computer, and more that will help us define who we are… much like chasing after 'The American Dream'. The desire to 'have' often comes from a desire for status; to 'keep up with the Joneses.' 2 Vaccines are offered here:

1. “Keep it real when it comes to the size of your mortgage”: This also applies to credit-card spending. Really, just don't buy things that are outside of your means. Also, don't define yourself my what you have!
2. “Back to Basics: be grateful for what you have got!”: Later on in this book, James describes a time when he and his wife were working out a budget to do some decorating and renovating on their home. After worrying about whether or not they could afford these changes and stressing about increasing their mortgage, they decided to leave the house as it was (apart from having a new boiler installed— a necessity for long UK winters). James realized that he and his wife should be “bloody glad to have a house at all”!

…to save myself some typing, I am going to skip the chapters on parenting— but I strongly suggest you read this book!

The final 'vaccine' chapter is “Be Authentic (Not Sincere), Vivacious (Not Hyperactive) and Playful (Not Game-Playing)”. So, this is a bit of a long chapter and it's not as straightforward as the rest of the book because these things are not to easy to define. I'll try to summarize:

being authentic= being real, being true in all times and places, being honest

being sincere= being open, being outwardly passionate or dramatic about one's feelings/beliefs

being vivacious= feeling alive, savouring the moment, having an active mind

being hyperactive= “compulsive Doing”, being an extrovert

being playful= having a sense of humour, a humourous way to deal with stresses and anxieties

being game-playing= using play to manipulate others, putting on a false persona (being a 'poser'), living in your fantasies/imagination

(I really suggest reading at least this chapter… since my summary is lacking)

… and the vaccines:

1. “Don't wait for a disaster before getting real”: a couple of the subjects James interviewed in this section were authentic, vivacious and playful because they had decided to get the most out of life after experiencing tragedy. The author urges us to savour each day and to be real! He offers an exercise: “imagine you have a fatal illness and are reviewing your life from that standpoint.” What would you change about how you live? I think one thing we would all do would be engaging in relationships more fully.
2. “Scale down your interest in people you have never met”: (I am thankful that James doesn't ask us to cut it out entirely, because I do enjoy my American Idol, haha.) Basically, read and watch less about people that don't matter to you and the people you love. Stop stressing about which celebrity is cheating on his wife, or how many kids Brangelina have! Limit your TV watching— especially reality shows and entertainment news.
3. “Develop Habits that Prevent Hyperactivity”: RELAX and get a good night's sleep (at least 8 hrs).
4. “Be honest with yourself about your dealings with others”: know who your friends are. Facebook friends are not necessarily actual friends. Make sure you have close friends; have a few people you can be honest with who will support you and who will be honest with you.
5. “Play with small children”

After stating his vaccines, James' “gloves come off”. He gives blunt advice about what we need to do to avoid 'The Virus' on a personal level as well as his political ideas.

It took me almost 3 months to read this book, but I'm glad I took my time because it has helped me to understand some really important things about actually 'Being' instead of just going with the flow. There are many times when I feel like what I am doing is just waiting for the next thing, or biding my time until something better comes along. But James really outlines the importance or engaging in the real world. I loves this book and I hope you will too!